Well, I don’t know about you but my day didn’t start up
great but hey I tried to make a way to make it fun cus I believe that no one or
nothing should take your sunshine or your happiness. You only give power to
anything or anyone who does that to you. I quickly understood that and held on
to that happiness that was almost being taken away.
Someone once said that the way to man’s heart is through his
stomach but earlier on I read a column on Nigerian tribune of a married woman
who says that the way to a man’s heart is under a woman’s skirt. We would like
to know if that’s true or not and also find out what the way to a woman’s heart
is…
Mrs. Bosede a Nigerian tribune columnist wrote something on her column
on how she thinks that the way to man’s heart is no longer the tummy but under
her skirt.
She says:
“I got a feedback from a woman who attended one of our Enjoying
Great Sexlife In Marriage Conferences a few months ago. She was having problems
with her husband, which resulted in not enjoying good marital relationship any
longer. She could not figure out why her husband had suddenly become a stranger
in the marriage. But at the conference, she learnt what sex means to a man, and
decided to try it out as a solution to her marital problem.
The result was amazing. With more
sex in the marriage, the fire of love was rekindled, and she can have anything
from her husband unsolicited for. To crown it all, her husband bought her a
brand new car two months ago. What she could not achieve over a long period of
time came to her on a platter through sex. Who says there is no magic in sex
with a man? This is the foundation of the thought for this piece as a tryout
solution for wives who are having issues with their husbands.
Many women today endure marriage
rather than enjoy it. The man that was once head over heels in love with them,
who could do anything for them, is now like a total stranger to them. As far as
many of these women are concerned, their man is the problem. He is the one that
must change. And in search of solution to their marital problems, they move
from one prayer house to another, pray all manner of prayers and take all
manner of counsel from both qualified and unqualified quarters.
The truth is, over the years, I
have come to discover that nobody has the power to change any other person
other than themselves. The only way to change others is to change ourselves.
For most of these women, the key to changing their husbands is changing
themselves. It has been said that one of the definitions of madness is to keep
doing things the same way and expect a different result.
To get a better result other than
you have been getting in your marriage, you must learn to do things
differently. And as said earlier, you have power over yourself alone and
not on your husband. So for once, look away from your husband and concentrate
on yourself. What are the things you should do differently to get a different
response from your man? The solutions to the problems we face in our homes as
women are not often beyond us. We only need to look inward rather than outward.
For women who are passing through turbulent times in their marriage and
sincerely desire a turn around, you may have to do the following:
-Work on your sex life
Many women need to know how
important sex is to a man and to the survival of their marriage. Many have lost
their husbands because they are not up and doing in bed. They are always
developing headaches and giving one excuse or the other every time their man
turns to them for sex. And many of those husbands have fallen into the hands of
hungry women who are ready to give them more than they desire, that which their
legal wives are always denying them. Is that the situation with you? If yes,
then you will have to change. The way God made a man, sex is the most important thing to him in
marriage. In fact, the first reason he married you is so that he can
have it when he wants it, and no matter what you do for him and on his behalf,
if he cannot have it when he desires it, he sees you as not fulfilling your
marital obligation to him.
The urge for sexual satisfaction
comes before every, and anything in a man’s life. This is unlike a woman, who
has sex as the last thing on her mind. He does not just see sex as pleasure, he
sees it as something he cannot do without; something that is paramount to his
survival in life. That is why he cannot but turn to another woman when the one
that should help him in fulfilling this urge is not forthcoming. As a wife, you must know that
the health of your sex life is directly proportionate to the health of your
marriage. The way to a man’s heart they say is his stomach,
but I have discovered that this is not the absolute truth.
To me, the way to a man’s heart
is under your skirt. That sounds dirty but it’s the truth.
When a man has a wife who is ‘alive sexually’ to him, he will do
everything and anything for her. There are homes that are surviving in
spite of the fact that the woman of the house is not a good cook. All they have
to do is to make sure a good cook is employed and a wise woman in such
situation makes sure she employs a man and not a woman as her cook so as to
make sure she does not create a crack in her marriage. But the role of sexual
fulfilment is such that a woman cannot employ another to fulfil. That is why
every woman must make it her priority if she wants to keep her man. And the
truth is, no matter what your opinion is concerning your husband, there are a
thousand and one women out there who will be so glad to help you in fulfilling
this role. So, my advice is, don’t be slack.
And Make it exciting
It is not enough for a woman to
be there for her man sexually, it is most important she contributes her quota
to make each of their sexual intercourse an exciting one. Many women
believe they are only to be on the receiving end. So, they just lie there like
a log of wood, not contributing to the act, waiting for him to be through. This
does not make for a great sex. For sex to be great for the two partners
involved, they both must participate. Your man may not tell you, but I can
speak authoritatively that he doesn’t enjoy being on the giving end alone. Like
he is touching you, he desires that you touch him as well. He desires that you
guide his hand to the part of your body that gives you utmost pleasure.
According to a columnist who goes by the name bosede she said that
In other to make the bed room exciting seeing that the way
to a man’s heart is through the skirt, another thing your husband desires is
that you sometime take the initiative. An average Nigerian woman believes she
will be playing cheap if she initiates sexual intercourse with her husband by
making the first move. And this belief does not only stop her from initiating
it, even when she wants sex, she pretends as if she does not want it, in order
not to appear cheap. But this is not the truth.
She said and in her words, My research revealed to me that rather
than men looking down on their wives for initiating sex, they see it as
something great. In fact, it is something every man looks forward to because it
gives them a sense of fulfillment. They see it as a confirmation from their
wives that they are satisfying her sexually and that she approves of them
sexually. It boosts their ego, it boosts their self-esteem. It boosts their
self-confidence and gives them an assurance that no man can lure her into it in
their absence.
Another thing that could make
your sexual life exciting to your man is by verbally expressing your
satisfaction to him in the very act. It is not a crime to let your man know
that you are enjoying him, after all, that man is the only man you can call
yours in the whole world. And the truth is, men love it when their wives tell
them how great they are in bed. It makes them feel on top of the world and
drive them to do everything possible to get better at the act.
This is the reason many men will
leave their pretty wives and patronize sex workers because she makes them to
feel like real men. And remember, because she is marketing herself so that they
will always come back to her, she goes out of her way to give it to him the way
he wants it. And the worst thing is, many of such sex workers have ended up
taking over the heart of the man completely. No wonder, it is often said that a
woman can extract the seemingly impossible promises from a man during and after
the act of sex.
Sex to a man is worth all to him,
and therefore will do anything for any woman who can dare to give it to him the
best way possible. Many men had divulged sacred information to women on the
altar of sex that had caused them so much, including their lives. If in doubt
of this assertion, a question put across to the biblical Samson, as to what
made him to tell the secret of his great power with his head on the lap of
Delilah, and the consequences thereof, will convince you. I hope wives
will learn this secret and adopt it in securing their husbands.
So you, what do say? Do you agree with her or not.. ?
CREDIT: Mrs. Bosede Ola of Nigerian Tribune
