I
had a really quiet day at home watching the movie “teen wolf” and getting intrigued by it till at about 7pm. That was
just when I realized that I could be late for the show on the radio. Usually on
Tuesdays I don’t get to prepare so hard for the show because hey that’s just a
day when people call in to confide in me about the issues that they might be
faced with…
Well,
unto the focus for today, I had a call from a guy named Michael who’s been in a
relationship with a lady that he thinks he truly loves. Here is the problem; he
travelled to the states for over three months only for him to come back to his
woman cheating on him. Now, he didn’t get to find out just immediately upon
arrival. Several dots were put together leading to his curiosity being
heightened and so to confirm his doubts, he asked her about it but as always
she tried to deny it until he threatened to walk away from the relationship. She
revealed that he had cheated on him with five men because he wasn't there when
she sexually needed him.
I don’t
know if she apologized but Michael told me that he walked out of the
relationship because he had every reason to have cheated on her too while he
was outside the country but didn't because of the intensity of love and level
of commitment he brought to the table.
Yet
still, after the breakup he couldn’t stand not being with her. He wasn’t concentrating
at work. He felt like a man drowning in a river, struggling to breathe but cant
because the moment you open your mouth while drowning you will take in water and
so in order not to let that happen; you hold your breath for as long as
possible till your head feels like exploding… that was how he felt and to stop
his head from exploding he ran back to her and even apologized….#surprised!
What
then is his problem now??? You may ask: well he called in to tell me that he is
about to propose to this same woman but he is beginning to wonder if there are
probabilities that she would still cheat on him peradventure a time comes when
he has to travelled for even a day…?
Now,
here is my thought, yea? A typical Nigerian man wouldn’t tolerate a second with
his woman cheating on him and so wouldn’t waste a minute ending the
relationship even in the face of the
fact that he too might have cheated at some points in that relationship but
what I don’t understand is why would any man want to go back to what is
obviously termed “A bad market”
And
just when I thought it doesn't get bad I had a whatsapp message pop in:
Hello
Jane, I'm Suzy from Abuja. I've got a similar issue, I've been in a
relationship for five years, sometime last year I cheated on my bf, felt so
guilty and I confessed to him, I begged 4 his forgiveness and he forgave me
after a while, but ever since den I felt our relationship has never been the
same, I've asked him for a breakup and he refused, he said he still loves me,
and he wants us to have a future together, I'm scared he has a different plan
entirely. I've done everything I can to make it up. He said he's forgotten
about it but I can't forget about d fact that I betrayed him. Please should I
insist on letting him go? Or believe he has actually forgiven me.
So
I am putting this out for you to comment on: How easy does a Nigerian man find
it in his heart to forgive infidelity and not hold it up against his woman in
the future?
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