I read an article today on how 1 in 4 women are out
earning their husbands. You can read it here if you’re interested.
I don’t know your take on this particular matter but some men tend to be
intimidated by women who make a lot of money and seem more successful than
them. Will someone please explain to me why it should matter or concern me if I
were to marry a woman who earns more money than me? It’s 2016, but even if it
was 1916 (I exaggerate), I wouldn’t have a problem. As a matter of fact, I’ve
been okay with this since 2013 when I dated a woman who lived in Parkview
Estate and drove a BMX X3 while I was messing around in my 1998 Honda Accord.
She earned way more than me and lived in a nice house and
drove a current model car. Meanwhile, I was living on Indomie, sharing a flat
in Ajah and drove a car that had a habit of embarrassing me at the wrongest
times. During the time we were together, money, or the lack of it, was never an
issue for her, for me, or for us.
So when I hear about men who whine over not being the
“breadwinner” in their family anymore I scratch my head and wonder what the
heck is wrong with them.
The reason no man should have a problem with a his wife
making more money than him is not because it means nothing but easy living –
enjoying the spoils of someone else’s hard work is never a good look, no matter
the gender – it’s because discriminating against a woman just because she
brings home more bacon than you is the male equivalent of a woman
discriminating against a man who doesn’t make enough.
In other words, they’re acting like a bunch of gold-diggers
but in their case, they should be referred to as pride-diggers.
A pride-digger is a man who ties his self-worth to his
wallet. If a woman is making more than a pride-digger, he gets uncomfortable
with the role-reversal, thus making it difficult for him to see how good she is
to him and for him. He won’t rest until he’s back to being the breadwinner, and
so he digs and digs and digs as far as he can to earn more just so his pride an
be restored.
If you ask me, it’s all a bunch of foolish, dogmatic,
traditionalism. No person should ever measure a man by whether of not he makes
more than his woman. He should be measured by how happy his woman is with him.
I have a friend who is married to a woman who makes a lot
more than he does. He is an up and coming entrepreneur while she is high up at
Wema Bank. Anytime she has to stay late at work, he drives through whatever
traffic he might face just to bring dinner to her in case she’s hungry. He say
that all he has to do to keep her happy is make her laugh, be great in bed, and
encourage her on days when she’s ready to throw in the towel at work.
These are lessons I plan to apply in marriage whether or
not my wife earns more than I do. Not because what is good for his wife is good
for all women. It’s because making a woman happy and lifting her spirits when
she’s down are priceless attributes a man can and should have and give freely
to his woman. Men should take some pride in being able to do that.
This does not mean I approve of men being lazy and
depending on their wives for sustenance. All I’m saying is this: Don’t let the
fact that she earns more than you make you throw away what may just be the best
thing to ever happen to you.
If you really feel so strongly about earning more than
your woman, pour that feeling into your hustle and find more ways to make money
within legal means and take back what you feel is your rightful place.
I also understand that some women use the fact that they
earn more than their men as a licence to look down on them and step all over
them even though their men are trying their best to be good husbands. You’re
dead wrong if that is you. Dead wrong. A hard working man that cares about you
enough to sacrifice his ego is a man worth keeping and treating like a king.
Cheers. Are you a dating a woman who earns more than you
or a man or earns less than you? What’s it like? How do you handle any
potential problems that come your way? Do you have any advice for people in
this particular situation? Please leave your comments below.
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